To Mama

Happy Mother's Day! I hope that today will be a joyful memory for all of you. Today I want to share memories of my mother. Some are very happy and others, not so much. My "Mama", was the third of eight children. She grew up on a farm when the predominant crop in the fields in South Carolina was cotton. From what I remember her speaking of, it was a lot of hard manual work. She had six sisters and one brother, so all of them had to work in the field. They were sharecroppers. My father's family was too, but that's a story for Father's Day.

Mama met Dad in the late 1940's and they dated for two years before getting married in the early 1950's. My brother was born first and I followed in 1961. I remember a happy childhood for the most part. Dad worked in the textile mill and Mama was a housewife. My brother and I loved each other, but we fought constantly. I don't mean argued, we fought! I developed a sharp tongue and a foul mouth as well as a quick temper. The temper part plagues me to this day, but I have gotten a lot better at self control. We were poor, but we didn't know it. I had good parents, we weren't abused or mistreated. Spankings were considered the norm if we misbehaved. It wasn't abuse, we knew the rules and penalties. Mama never spanked me with her hand. She would make me go get my own "switch" off of a small tree or bush. She would use that. I learned that getting the biggest limb I could get worked best for me. She would feel real bad about hitting me with something big. :) If you got a wimpy switch, that just made her more angry.

When I was ten years old, Mama got sick. She cried all of the time and thought people hated her. She became withdrawn and fearful. I had no idea what was happening, but Dad had to do something. That's when Mama was diagnosed with Schizophrenia. She spent a lot of time in the hospital and the rest of us just did the best we could with sharing her household duties. This is where I learned to do a little cooking and other domestic tasks. Folks, no one can replace Mama! No one can say the right word when you are hurting, and no one will ever love you like your mother. After all the hospital time, medication, and shock therapy, she did get some better. Schizophrenia is not something that gets cured. Not yet at least. Life was different after that, but I always loved her just the way she was. The only thing I can recall that I didn't like was that if she thought someone wronged me, she would let them have a piece of her mind. That proved to get me into hot water with a lot of my friends and others that I knew. It was just how she perceived it.

I lost her in 2001 to congestive heart failure. I miss her more than I can say, but I have so many happy memories of her. I hold them close to my heart and mind. If your mom is gone as mine is, do something today that you know that she would have enjoyed. If you still have your mom, tell her today how much you love her. Don't let it go unspoken. Do what you can for her even if she drives you a little crazy sometimes. Remember, no one! loves you like your Mama.