A Quick "To Do" List

Since I have had so much time to think lately, I have pondered the questions around relationships. Whether you be male or female you are given a capacity for love and being loved. Lots of times I have found the biggest problems on this subject comes out of our own mouths and sometimes actions. We men especially need some help in this area. So I have comprised a do and do not list for those that may be challenged in this area. Thanks to my wife, Nita, who contributed to this post. This list is now in its complete form. :)

Do: Tell your lady that you enjoy her cooking and that you always look forward to what she prepares.

Don't: Tell your lady that the fork tasted better than the meal and not to fix that again. (Been there and done that. Big mistake!!)

Do: Compliment them on how they look when you are going out somewhere for dinner or out on the town.

Don't: ask...."Are you wearing that again?!! We need to get you some clothes!"

You also need to strike the word "fat" from your vocabulary. No words like "hefty", "big boned" or the term "very healthy." Try not to use these words at all. Everyone's life will be much better.

Do: Get creative and maybe come up with a little poem or note to be romantic now and then.

Don't: Give them this poem:

A peach is a peach
and a plum is a plum
but what is a kiss
without a tongue.

This will produce the best or worst results. Just depends on timing and mood. Trust me. :)

Do: Offer to take out the trash without being told to.

Don't: Ask her to take out the trash while you have a tv remote in your hand.

Do: Try to be helpful in the household chores paying attention to how she wants things done.

Don't: Tell her that you are out of shirts and she is getting behind on the job!

Little side note here. I believe when I got married some of my brain fell out between the altar and the car. I used to be able to find everything in my wardrobe. Now there are days when I can't find my clothes without yelling "Honey! Have you seen my socks?" The only way around this is to help with some of the domestic chores and try to put them away yourself. Remind yourself that you became brain damaged between the altar and the car. I speak as a bare foot man writing this.

Do: Notice the things she looks at in the stores. Especially jewelry, favorite scents and that sort of thing. Sneak away, get it gift wrapped and surprise her with it. Paying special attention to birthdays and anniversaries.

Don't: Mention how much an item cost or how much trouble it was to get. Nothing like....."I could have bought the entire mine for that!!" or "I thought of you when I saw that cheap thing." Never ever use the words "cheap" or "Pawn Shop" in the conversation. :)

Do: Realize that little things mean a lot. It doesn't cost a lot of money to notice what colors she wears most often or to write her a little love note and stick it somewhere she's bound to find it. A thank you note stuck under the dirty socks and underwear on the floor will be something she never forgets.

Don't: Mess it up by getting too wordy. That just seems fake. Keep it simple and sweet.

Do: Really pay attention when she talks to you. If you listen and show her by your actions that you did, she will love you for it.

Don't: Assume you know everything she would have told you if you really didn't listen. It will bite you in the end if you do.

Trust me guys!! I am trying to help you here! You may ask have I done anything on the "don't" list? Yes I have. Still do from time to time but I am learning as I go. In the end, it is all worth it. There is no substitute for having that special someone in your life and it is as much up to you as it is her to be aware of the little things. Treat all people kindly but treat the lady in your life special. :) You will benefit the most. I am sure there are other things that could be added here. Please feel free to comment and give any suggestions you may have!  Now where is that remote?

How I Spent My Vacation

Hi everyone!! Guess who? :) It has been a while and I am glad to be back on schedule now. I am glad to be doing this again because I have missed it terribly. I have missed all of you!! :) I would like to say the reasons I took a leave were all resolved but alas, they are not. Still, running away isn't helping so I have decided to return. Blogs tend to be filled with lots of things and in my case, very personal things that are close to my heart. I also tend to wear that heart on my sleeve. This post is no exception. When I stopped writing, I was truly discouraged. Now I hate to be a negative person and I didn't want that to carry over and just bring everyone down with me. I would rather be like an old hound dog that goes away by himself to lick my wounds.

I wonder if all of us come to a point in our lives that are like the crossroads. You know, a place in your life where you feel like you have to make life altering decisions and wonder what all you have done to this point has meant. I am at that place right now. Being out of work gives you time to think. I think some of that is needed but too much of anything is a bad thing. Some of my family and friends say I am going through a mid-life crisis. I shunned that idea at first but now think that may be just the case. Anyway, that was the reason for my departure. While I have been gone I have buried myself in my job hunt and my Facebook account. Some of that has been good and some of it not so good. I have met a lot of people there that are very special to me though. I consider them friends in the true sense of the word. I also consider the regulars of this blog my friends. Being away has given me some ideas for some new posts which I will start to work on soon. I don't know how frequent I will be at posting but I have decided to try and stick with it this time. Good or bad it will be what it is.

Now before anyone gets too concerned about me I just want to say that I still have a lot of nice things in my life. I just was concentrating on the negative too much. The job situation has not improved for me but I am not the only one in that boat at this time. Its really rough out there right now. You just about have to be in the right place at the right time and the market is flooded with younger and nicer looking applicants than myself. I Know that every dog has their day and I will have mine eventually. Just have to find the right place. For now, you are stuck with me. :) I have some computer posts I want to share and some on social networking as well. I still have a support system in place, a roof over my head, food to eat. As far as a job? Well three out of four is pretty doggone good!! :) You all take care and I will catch you on the flip side!!

Hiatus

I know it has been a while since I posted anything here. I am sorry about that. I really do enjoy doing this an I have missed it. I have missed all of you. :)

Sometimes one's life gets complicated due to work or health or the lack thereof in my case. I have had a lot to say over the past few months and I still have more I want to share. I still consider myself young (at heart anyway) and look forward to life. Any post I would have made in the past few weeks would have been a downer post. Mostly due to my state of mind and I did not want to share those kinds of thoughts. "If you don't have anything good to say, well, don't say it." I was taught this from youth and while it may not be completely true in all cases, it is hard to let go of things we are taught as children. It is not my desire to make my bad day your bad day.

I will be on hiatus from this blog until at least Labor Day. I hope this will give me the time I need to recharge my batteries, so to speak. Lots of things to sort out and plans I have to make. I want you all to know that you mean very much to me and this is a difficult choice. The interaction I have had with you has helped me during a difficult time in my life and your comments and friendship mean a lot to me. It would be rude of me to not let you know I was going to be gone and why. I plan to make my best effort to my other blog, which I have neglected also. I don't plan to take a hiatus from that but the posts will be less frequent unless I am otherwise directed. The purpose there is far too important for me to neglect.

You can still contact me during this time though the comments or email. I may even be on AIM. :) Hard to shut me up completely. :) My email address and AIM screen name is on my blogger profile. See you all later.

How does your garden grow?

I have received at least two questions on the alternative gardening method that I was going to try this year. Today I will try to answer those questions. This has been a fun year to garden because of this experimentation. Let me start from the beginning. In March, my wife sent me an email that had a link in it to hay bale gardening. Yes, I still have hay fever. :) I don't know if any of you have ever heard of this before but it was an interesting subject to me. I always had a fascination with things that were unconventional and just plain odd. :) I told my wife that we would have to come up with some hay bales which was something that I just don't carry around in my hip pocket. Through a friend of ours who has some horses, we were able to come up with 8 bales of hay. I thought that would be good enough to carry out the experiment. Two of the bales were packed loosely so I ended up with six that I could use. I laid down some black plastic and put my bales over the top of them in a double row. Why did I put down the plastic? The short answer is that my wife told me to. :) She said she read somewhere that it would help hold the moisture in the bales longer. I angled the last two because I wanted too. :)



Now by the book, you are supposed to water the bales (it takes a lot of water) and add ammonium nitrate to them daily. Now of course I didn't do this. I watered them a little and put regular fertilizer on them and watered them down heavy to make it soak in. Ammonium nitrate is the better way to go. It is a regulated chemical and you will have to sign for it if you use it. This is the same stuff that those nut cases used to bomb the Federal building in Oklahoma City a few years back. That is why you have to sign for it. You can find it at a farmer supply type place. You could call around in your area and probably find it without too much trouble. Like I said, it is the better alternative for this type of gardening. You add the fertilizer and water daily for a week. I really think that a week and a half to two weeks would be better. The fertilizer generates heat like you would get in a compost pile. The heat has to dissipate so that you won't kill your plants.



I water these things daily unless it rains. I water them heavily because they have no way to hold on to large amounts of water. After the initial fertilizing, I fertilize with something like Miracle-Gro once a week. Now these are the results down below after a few weeks. I am growing yellow squash, tomatoes, eggplant, and pepper. Next year I think this would make a wonderful way to grow bush beans without having to bend over so far. That will take quite a few bales. I think an herb garden would be wonderful grown this way. You would just want to start the seedlings somewhere else first. This is a test, it is only a test. :) If you would like to know more about this subject from an expert you should check this link. This man lives in the same county I do but I do not know him personally. His videos are the most informative that I have found on the subject. If you want to do this right, it will be worth checking the videos out. My results are just OK. I think that is because I didn't do it exactly like it was supposed to be done. Going against the grain seems to be a weakness of mine. I've already started seedlings for the second wave of plants I will use after these are spent. I plan to do this until first frost. That's pretty much it and I wish you all a happy growing season! :)

Summer hunting season

I am still in the midst of a job search right now.  Not a lot has happened since I last wrote about this.  I have altered some of my techniques though.  I only try to make in person contacts now.  No more of this calling around stuff.  Online applications are not something that I am doing right now.  I find them to be long and tedious.  They are demoralizing to me.  I carry a copy of my resume´ with me and a list of my references.  If a company is not taking applications, I ask will they accept a copy of my resume´.  Most of the time they will but what I want to talk about today is the interview and the parts of the resume´.

As of yet, I haven't had the first call back for an interview.  This is a first for me.  I have been in the workforce since I was 16 years old and it just feels so foreign to me to be out of work so long.  Now I haven't started worrying about this because in my heart of hearts I believe that something will turn up.  It may not be just what I was looking for but it will be something to pay the bills so to speak.  Now the resume´ writing has changed a little since I first learned to write one.  There is this part called the "objective" and that seems a little odd to me.  My objective is to get a job!  Now I can't put that on there can I?  It just doesn't sound professional.  So you have to come up with a sugar coated way to say the same thing.  This to me is stupid.  Now you know why I hate politics.  Things that should be so simple are made to be so complicated.  I think I will omit this.  The work history and education areas are OK I suppose.  I don't give more information than I have to there though because I want to explain more of this in an interview.  I just have where I worked and what I did and the hire dates.  I only go back 10 years unless the information from a past job is pertinent to the job I am applying for.  Employers generally only keep records 7 years or so on you.  Many times if you have been away for longer than that, they won't have a record of your employment.  This does vary from company to company and they may remember you anyway, but don't count on it.  Another part of my resume´ is references.  Work and personal references to be exact.  Now I will only furnish this on a separate sheet upon request.  I appreciate all of the people that said that I could use their personal information to help me to gain employment.  I don't hand that information out to just anyone and certainly not like giving away a free coupon or something.  I have a friend in a nearby city that is a manager of a company.  There is a special paper that you can buy just to print a resume´ on.  It usually is heavy milled and has a watermark on it if you hold it to the light.  My friend will hold the resume´ up to the light and if the watermark is upside down, he throws the thing in the trash!  He won't even look at the content.  I haven't told him, but I think it is stupid to let a potentially good employee slip through your fingers just because of a watermark.  I don't use this special paper anyhow. :)  Call me a maverick.  I may be an unemployed maverick, but a maverick, nonetheless. :)

If I can get to the interview, life will be good.  Interviews don't intimidate me because I can usually talk my way into a job.  The person interviewing is just a person like me and that is how I have always looked at it.  You have to have all of your ducks in a row when you go in there though.  Nothing really in my past that would hinder me so I am confident when I get to this part.  It is just getting to the interview that is driving me nuts right now.  Now I know some of you are going through the same thing and you all have a few different techniques that you use.  Perhaps we could compare notes and give each other a few pointers.  Anything to pass the time. :)  Hopefully, the next time I post about this will be about how I got the job!  I'll definitely post that when it happens! :)

Grandpa's Farm

Here in the South it is common to find family farms.  They are quickly becoming a past way of life.  It is difficult for many of them to make enough money from farming and they are simply going away.  Now and then you will meet someone that is good at it and you can tell that farming is in their blood.  I believe some people were just born to do certain things.  My grandpa was born to be a farmer.  When I was young you could find him out in the fields on his tractor or using a hoe to cultivate crops.  I am not talking about a garden, I am talking about 60 acres.  He worked it for the most part by himself without any help.  Sometimes my dad or my uncles would help.  My Granny would always be working too but that is a story for later.  Grandpa usually liked to do things by himself.  He loved the work he did on the farm.   He would raise watermelons, cantaloupes, and cotton.  Cotton was still a money crop in the late 60's and early 70's in South Carolina.  When I was in the first grade I would come home from school and pick cotton for money.  He paid me 3 cents a pound. :)  Do you have any idea how long it takes for a 7 year old to pick a pound of cotton?  It takes quite a while.  I think my friend and myself were able to get $2.75 to split between us one week.  That was a good week for me. :)  Well, in 1968 it was pretty good. 

Like I said, Grandpa would grow watermelons and cantaloupes as well.  There was this 20 acre field below the highway he would plant in watermelons almost every year.  Planting this type of crop near the road baffled me.  People would drive by and see this and of course some would stop and steal a watermelon.  High school kids were the most common culprit.  It was just a temptation that proved to be too hard to resist at times.  Grandpa knew every watermelon and cantaloupe that grew in his field.  He knew when someone had been there even if they had left no sign.  How he did this I do not know but he was never wrong about it.  One year there were these high school boys that would stop in the dead of night and not only steal but vandalize his stuff.  Grandpa would take a couple of boxes of shotgun shells and fill them with rock salt.  Sometimes he would just leave the bird shot in them.  He camped out in the middle of the field that night and waited.  Sure enough the kids came back and began to steal and vandalize his stuff again.  He could hear them talking about him mocking him and cussing him.  They didn't know that he was out there with them. :)  In our community everyone knew everyone else.  So these fellas were local and were calling him by name unaware that he was right behind them.  He jumped up and began firing.  Now in all honesty, from  the range he was shooting at, he couldn't have done much damage.  He didn't want to kill them.  He just wanted to teach them a lesson.  He did just that!  They jumped up screaming and hollering and got in their car and drove away.  The town doctor in Honea Path said that he picked shot out of their backsides all night long.  Even at that range he was a pretty good shot.  The town police were called and he told them that it was a county matter and for them to get off of his property.  They fussed a little but they did leave.  It was understood in those days that a farmer would protect his livelihood with force if necessary.  Grandpa never had those fellas steal his watermelons anymore.  He told me this story laughing so hard that tears filled his eyes.  My Grandpa was an interesting man to say the least.  He passed away in the mid 1990's at the age of 90.  I think about him often and smile.  One reason I smile is because of a question that I have.  Why did my Grandpa plant those watermelons so close to the road? ;)

Class Reunion

This year will mark the 30 year reunion of my high school class.  I really wish I were excited about this because I have not seen most of those folks since I left school.  However, I have mixed feelings about this.  I think everyone wishes they had been more successful in their career or perhaps had the perfect family.  Having good health at this age is always a plus.  You have a natural curiosity about what happened to the girl you were sweet on or the friend who had a plan to make a million dollars by age 25.  How many of us thought being 25 was old?  I know I did.  There were awkward moments too.  I remember when I got caught smoking on school grounds.  I knew I was in trouble but didn't see the need for all of the fuss they made over it.  After all, it was just a cigarette.  It was only a cigarette this particular time.  I didn't get into a fight in high school even though I came close a few times.  I had a problem with temper in grammar school and I got into a lot of fights.  After grammar school I told myself I wasn't going to fight in school anymore.  For the most part I was a good student. I did my work and if I applied myself there was a lot I could get done.  I wasn't a great student but I was solid  student. I still am.

Have you ever known someone from your school who you recall their face but you can't remember their name?  Someone who for the most part was quiet and seemed to fade into the background without being noticed?  In fact, if it were not for an old annual sitting around you wouldn't remember them at all?  That person was me.  Most of my friends were a year of two older or a year or two younger.  I connected with people who were not necessarily classmates.  The classmates I really cared for moved away during my high school years.  This was not their fault it was just the way things worked out.

Now I am 30 years older and have lived a lot of life.  I have lived much of it for the Lord who I love so much and have given my life to.  I have lived it for the family whom I am so devoted to.  I lived it for an industry which was pretty much run out of this country.  I have lived it the best I knew how to.  So I ask you today, what is success?  Is it only finances and a great amount of friends?  Is it just rising through the ranks in your career?  I think it is much more than that. I think success is to look back and not be willing to change a thing.  Success is such a deceptive topic.  Success is truly relative to the person.  So many things in life depend on circumstances that are beyond our control.  I haven't made my mind up completely if I will be going to this reunion.  I would like to see some of those people.  I know that none of us are the same person.  I know  I am not.  However,  there was a lot of hurt in those days too and the feelings from the ghost of high school past are the most haunting of all.  It brings up memories of things which happened in my life when my life wasn't good.  The reunion isn't until October so I still have a little time to mull over these thoughts and feelings I am having.  I will talk to the Lord about those feelings and then make up my mind.  I will let you know what I decide.

The journey

Today I wanted you update everyone on my continuing saga of losing weight.  I started walking a couple of months ago and I have regained my wind and my distance.  I have to admit that I haven't been the most faithful at sticking to the program.  I am going about twice a week instead of everyday.  I am going to have to change that part.  There is something therapeutic that happens inside of your head after you walk the first mile.  I have in the last couple of months lost about 10 pounds which is just OK considering that the last time I started walking, I lost 30 pounds in a little over a month.  That was 15 years ago though. I really wish that I had maintained what I had then with some exercise.   Hindsight is 20/20 though.  I am not starving myself this time either.  I eat pretty much my normal diet and cut out the second portions.  I have eliminated any drinks and most food containing sugar which is probably a good thing.  I am drinking only water, coffee and green tea.  The occasional diet soda.  I mean the very occasional diet soda!  I don't particularly like the taste of the sweetener they use for those.  I think I can keep up with these kind of changes on a permanent basis.  That is what I think it will take to keep the weight from returning like it did the last time.

I can't say that after losing only 10 pounds I have those ripped abs of steel!  Not even a 6 pack to be seen.  I suppose my belly resembles more of a 2 liter bottle of soda covered with a shirt.  I think I will keep it covered with the shirt for just right now. :) However, something is going on with my body.  I notice that I am able to wake a little quicker as of late.  I have a little more spring in my step.  I know that my attitude is better!  Right now I am going to put on my walking shoes and go out while the morning sun is shining.  So I will continue this little adventure of mine in another month or two to let you all know where I am at with this. 

Spring Flush!

I have been like a kid in a candy store the past week! My roses started their Spring flush. Now I have neglected them over the past 3 years because I could not work with them due to arthritis. My new medicine hasn't cured it, but I can do things a lot better this year. I had 8 plants that I moved to a special part of my garden. This is my rose hospital. These plants were alive, but just barely. I put them in a place that gets full sun for most of the day. It is just a better place for them. It is next to the woods so that I can toss the less fortunate out there. I lost most of my roses through neglect and I lost one to stupidity. I tried to use some fertilizer that was too strong on my beautiful Knockout rose and ended up over doing it. I burned it up! Now I only use a water soluble fertilizer. I was able to take some canes from it before it completely died and had many offspring from this one plant. Let me show you some of the roses in my garden this year.

Above is an antique rose that I grew from a cutting. This is a three year old plant. My mother in law brought this rose back from Ohio with her to North Carolina when she was a teenager. That is the way I understood it. My mother in law will turn 90 years old this year. I am sure this was a popular garden variety rambler in its day. I don't know the name of it. This rose has the classic rose fragrance. I will be taking more cuttings of this one this year.

This rose is a rugosa called "Sir Thomas Lipton."  It stands about 4 feet tall as a three year old shrub. It blooms several times through the year, but the Spring flush is the most vibrant. Believe it or not, this is a bad year for this one. I have seen this rose with so many blooms that you could barely see the foliage. It has a sweet clove fragrance.

This is a floribunda rose called "Europena."  It was mislabeled as a "Mr. Lincoln" hybrid tea. It is a small compact little rose and a good companion for annual bedding plants.

This is a "Mr. Lincoln" rose. A hybrid tea with long stemmed red fragrant roses. I wish that I could get a field of these to bloom in February for Valentine's Day! I have trouble getting this one to live! I thought that it had died last year and it came back to what you see here. It requires pampering and it will grow up to about 6 feet tall. Kind of ugly as a stand alone rose because it is gangly in appearance. Better suited to the back of a rose garden to hide the long gangly canes. One of the best fragrances in the rose world!

This is a "Sunny Knockout" rose that I bought this year. It will grow to about three feet tall by three feet in diameter when it is fully mature. I love all of the "Knockout" varieties because they bloom continuously through the growing season. No fragrance here though. That is the only fault that I have found with this rose. These blooms start out vibrant yellow and fade to a cream color. 

The last rose that I want to show you is called "Pink Grootendorst."  One of my favorite rugosa roses. Hardly any fragrance, which is unusual for a rugosa. Grootendorst also comes in white and red varieties with the same bloom form and carnation appearance.

This is not all of my roses, but I have to stop somewhere with this post. :) I wish these roses had been in better form this year, but that will be something to work on throughout the season. I have yet to deal with the Japanese Beetles, on whom I will show no mercy this year.  I am glad that I was able to have any roses at all to show you all this year. That in itself is somewhat of a miracle. My wife calls this my "therapy." I suppose that she is right. Perhaps I will go outside after while and have a group session. :)

Dearly Beloved

The day I got married was a happy day in my life. That day, I slept until noon! :) I was working a swing shift and I was adjusting to being off for a few days from the night shift. Usually I could make this transition pretty well but this time it took a couple of days. I woke up that day with a lot of happiness and didn't have a care in the world. I had to be at the church at 5:00 PM and the wedding would start at 6:00 PM. So what does a bachelor do on his last day? He wastes time doing a lot of nothing. I did this well until about 4:00 then I realized that I had forgotten to buy the bridal bouquet. "Oh No!" was the first thing out of my mouth. I called the florist to see what time they close on Saturday and they said 4:30. I said, "Could you do me a favor and see me at 4:45?" I told them my situation and they laughed at me, but did agree to this. They put this little bouquet of daisies and roses together for me in about 20 minutes. It was very nice but I had to pay through the eye teeth for it because of my forgetfulness. I also kept them after their normal hours. It was then that I was aware that the time was now 5:15. I noticed that I was starting to wring my sweaty hands.

"OK Khris, time to get it in gear!" So the church was about 20 minutes away at this point. I was dressed and had the bouquet and got there at about 5:45. The traffic didn't cut me any slack. So now I have this bouquet and give it to the bridesmaid and they take it back to my future wife. The preacher, my best man, and I all go into this little room in the back. "Man am I glad that's over!" Then these two proceed to tell me how it isn't over and what to expect. The preacher had laryngitis from a virus and was barely able to speak. About then my legs started to shake. The shaking happened right before the hyperventilation. I haven't been nervous the entire day and all of a sudden, I am terrified! The next thing I knew, it was time to stand at the altar. We proceed out and everything has begun. I was sweating, my knees were shaking and I was just a nervous wreck! My brother was my best man and I could see him smile at me. That was encouraging! He used to only smile at me before he beat me up! How comforting! The music started and I saw my bride. She was the most beautiful sight that I had ever seen in my life. She had the bouquet that I had almost forgotten and her father was walking her toward me. I remember the vows and I remember the introduction of the new couple to the congregation, but most everything else is a blur. The associate pastor had to deliver the final prayer because the preacher had lost all of his voice just after he pronounced us man and wife. I also remember seeing my car as we left the church. It was pretty well made up. All sorts of things written on it and all manner of debris on it. That did not really bother me, it was a Ford and not really a good looking one. This was an improvement actually! :)

Now my bride had woke up at 6:00 AM on the day of our wedding. She had a million things to do before the wedding. She had a lot of family in from out of town and it was very chaotic for her. By the time we got to her apartment after the reception, she was exhausted. For that matter I was too. I would like to say it was a very romantic evening but we were both so wasted from nerves and everything else that we just slept. We had relatives and well wishers over until almost midnight. She had this little twin size bed and we both tried to sleep in it. When I woke up, she was on the floor. She told me there just wasn't room on the bed for both of us. So much for the romantic wedding night. One thing is for sure. It was truly a memorable day for a lot of other reasons. :)

To Mama

Happy Mother's Day! I hope that today will be a joyful memory for all of you. Today I want to share memories of my mother. Some are very happy and others, not so much. My "Mama", was the third of eight children. She grew up on a farm when the predominant crop in the fields in South Carolina was cotton. From what I remember her speaking of, it was a lot of hard manual work. She had six sisters and one brother, so all of them had to work in the field. They were sharecroppers. My father's family was too, but that's a story for Father's Day.

Mama met Dad in the late 1940's and they dated for two years before getting married in the early 1950's. My brother was born first and I followed in 1961. I remember a happy childhood for the most part. Dad worked in the textile mill and Mama was a housewife. My brother and I loved each other, but we fought constantly. I don't mean argued, we fought! I developed a sharp tongue and a foul mouth as well as a quick temper. The temper part plagues me to this day, but I have gotten a lot better at self control. We were poor, but we didn't know it. I had good parents, we weren't abused or mistreated. Spankings were considered the norm if we misbehaved. It wasn't abuse, we knew the rules and penalties. Mama never spanked me with her hand. She would make me go get my own "switch" off of a small tree or bush. She would use that. I learned that getting the biggest limb I could get worked best for me. She would feel real bad about hitting me with something big. :) If you got a wimpy switch, that just made her more angry.

When I was ten years old, Mama got sick. She cried all of the time and thought people hated her. She became withdrawn and fearful. I had no idea what was happening, but Dad had to do something. That's when Mama was diagnosed with Schizophrenia. She spent a lot of time in the hospital and the rest of us just did the best we could with sharing her household duties. This is where I learned to do a little cooking and other domestic tasks. Folks, no one can replace Mama! No one can say the right word when you are hurting, and no one will ever love you like your mother. After all the hospital time, medication, and shock therapy, she did get some better. Schizophrenia is not something that gets cured. Not yet at least. Life was different after that, but I always loved her just the way she was. The only thing I can recall that I didn't like was that if she thought someone wronged me, she would let them have a piece of her mind. That proved to get me into hot water with a lot of my friends and others that I knew. It was just how she perceived it.

I lost her in 2001 to congestive heart failure. I miss her more than I can say, but I have so many happy memories of her. I hold them close to my heart and mind. If your mom is gone as mine is, do something today that you know that she would have enjoyed. If you still have your mom, tell her today how much you love her. Don't let it go unspoken. Do what you can for her even if she drives you a little crazy sometimes. Remember, no one! loves you like your Mama.

Happy Mother's Day!

This is going to be short today. I have something else planned to post here tomorrow for my mom. So I wanted to take the time and opportunity to wish all of the women that read this a very happy Mother's Day! I hope that it will be special for you and that it will be more than you could ask for! You ladies put up with a lot from us husbands and the kids throughout the year. Trust me, I know. :) It is only fitting that you have a day dedicated to yourselves as mothers. This would be the perfect opportunity to ask your kids to do an extra chore or two. :) Even the husbands might get into the spirit with a back rub or something. I think you should push it for all that it is worth. ;) Happy Mother's Day everyone!

That new car smell!

A friend of mine bought a new car recently. I could tell by the way they spoke that they were very excited and happy about it. I was happy for them as well. Nothing like that smell of a new car. I haven't had that pleasure in quite some time now. I haven't bought a new car since 1990. I buy disposable cars. You know the kind. You find someone selling their old car that is parked in their yard. I do this because I hate car payments. Now once again, this is a personal preference and I think that you should do what is right for you. However, disposable cars are right for me. In 1982 I finally gave up the car that I had when I started driving. To this day, that was my favorite car with the most precious memories. My first date, showing it off to my friends. The cruising! Lets not forget the cruising! This car had passed its prime though. It was blowing oil from the motor and it was getting difficult to maintain.

I found someone that was selling a 1971 VW Super Beetle and I had always wanted a smaller car. I bought it for about $1000, which was a pretty penny then for a car that was 11 years old. I put this notebook in it so that I could log all of my expenses in it for the car. I was going to save a fortune with a smaller car! I paid for it and drove it away. Now in my part of the country, when you make an agreement and shake hands, what you bought is your problem. Even if it dies before you get out of the driveway! It didn't exactly die right then. It did start to rain on the way home. That is when I found out that the wiper motor didn't work. Well that cost a $150 dollars. So I logged that in my book. I couldn't get the gas milage that I wanted out of this car for some reason. I then had the carburetor rebuilt. That was right at $100. One day the horn stuck on the steering wheel. That was another $35. I put a new radio in it, which is another post in itself. That was $250. CB radios used to be a big deal down here. I put one of those in. While doing the drilling for the mounts, I drilled through the gas tank. Not even going to say what that mistake cost me. This car was bleeding me dry! One day I was out with friends on a Sunday afternoon. A Porche 911 pulled up beside me at a stop light and revved its engine. I looked over and nodded and gunned it when the light turned green. I got off to a good start but was overtaken quickly. I'm in a Bug for goodness sake! That is when I heard this "Pop" from the engine compartment. The pop turned to silence as I coasted into a parking lot. I finally found someone to tow me home. I had dropped a valve. This cost me almost $400. I have had this car less than 2 months and I was about broke. I went to the used auto sales lot and bought a 1979 Ford F-150 truck with what remained of my money. You could stick a fork in this country boy! I was done! No more Bugs for this boy. I could have had the engine rebuilt in my old car for what I have spent. I did sell it for what I paid though. I would like to say that I made better decisions in the years to come. Some were, and some weren't. Those are the breaks. If any of you are ever down this way and are looking for a car, I have this "creampuff" out in the yard I will make you a good deal on. :)

What do you think doc?

I really dislike having to go to any doctor. I am not afraid to go to a doctor, but I just hate the time it takes, and the cost involved. Before I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis, I went to several specialists trying to find out what was the matter with me. I went to three different doctors without getting a diagnosis. In fact, they said it was in my mind. I still don't understand how not being able to raise my arms above my head constitutes mental illness. This farce cost me a fortune! Finally, I changed General Practitioners and my new doctor found the problem in less than 30 minutes. This experience changed the way that I viewed those in the medical profession. Not just regular doctors, but dentists, optometrists, chiropractors and all of them. My old view was that the doctor was a highly trained professional that was dedicated to my well being. I was not to argue and be compliant. The new view I have is that doctors are trained professionals. Many are more concerned with their golf handicap than my well being, and I should look out for myself. This is not the norm, but it exists. When they don't have an answer, and they put it off on something else, I will challenge them. Like any professional does, they provide a service for hire. If I pay for this service, I want my money's worth. No service, no payment! I ask questions...lots of questions. I didn't go to medical school. I expect them to have the answers.

I went to an optometrist the other day and got my eyes checked. I think he did a very good job in the exam and answering all of my questions. I did not, however, get my glasses from him. The frames and glasses I would have selected would have come to over $250. I thought that was too much and that he would be angry with me, but he wasn't. In fact, he gave me advice about getting my new glasses at a lower cost. Since I am trying to save money right now, I took a chance and got my new glasses at one of the online providers. The prescription I had was for progressive lenses, so I was taking a chance on getting everything adjusted correctly. I selected what I wanted and typed in my prescription and I had them three weeks later. I am happy with this choice now. I have my glasses and can see what I am typing for a change. However, your mileage may vary, and I would be amiss at telling you this is the way to go for you. That is your decision to make! This doctor gave me some hope in trusting my well being to him. Perhaps I have been too hasty in my general assessment of them. Maybe I ask too many questions and am being way too paranoid. Naah! It is much more fun to go to the doctor when I think I am in control!

My Fuzzy Friends

Growing up, I cannot remember ever not having a dog. I just always had one. My first dog was named "Penny". She was a Chihuahua mix. I don't remember much about her as she was hit by a car when I was four years old. I had another dog that looked just like her not long after that and we named her "Gypsy". She never was spayed and soon I had three more dogs. This thing of always having a family dog continued until I married and moved away. We never could get a cat to stay with us. I think that it must have been the dogs or something. At this point, I really didn't like cats all that much anyway. In high school I had a Pointer mix named "Ben". Now Ben was a cool dog. All of my dogs before this had been gun shy. Every now and then, we would go rabbit hunting or quail hunting. Ben wasn't too good at the rabbit hunting thing, but neither was I. However, he was a wonderful bird dog. He would point, and then flush out the birds. If it flew, I could drop it. I was always was a good shot with a flying object. I have yet to get a rabbit. :) After Ben died, my mom got a lap dog that she had at the time I was married.

After I got married, we were able to have cats. My wife had been a cat person all of her life. She had dogs as well, but she really loved cats. One cat led to four cats, and four cats led to twelve. That's when I said, "We have to get a dog." I knew, or thought I did, that dogs would make the cats uncomfortable. Perhaps, they would even run away. I know... I'm awful. So we went to the animal shelter and got a dog, a beautiful German Shepherd. Now he wasn't too happy to be there with us and he broke loose from his chain. Well, that was the last I ever saw of him. I looked for two weeks before I finally gave up. About a year later, we get this Lab/Chow mix that looked like a Lab, but was solid gray with a black tongue. This dog loved me. Finally, everything was going to work out. Two months later, someone stole her. We lived in the city at that time and we were in kind of a rough neighborhood. A neighbor saw her get stolen. Turns out it was the neighbor that stole her. They either sold her or gave her away to someone else they knew. For some reason, I could not keep a dog. I think it must have been the cats or something. Turns out, that the cats we had carried Feline Leukemia, and I lost them one by one. This was when I learned to be a cat person as well as a dog person. I hate to see anything suffer, and watching them get put down just broke my heart.

Now after twenty three years, we have five cats. They too tested positive for Feline Leukemia, so we have to keep them away from other cats that may be around. We take care of them the best that we can. We have lost many cats recently, one by one. I have long since learned to love cats. Eventually, we will lose all of them, and because they are all spayed or neutered, they can't reproduce. They all have trouble with any virus or infection. I may try to get another dog in a few years. After all of them are gone, of course. I don't want them to feel replaced in the time they have left. Perhaps another cat. Maybe even one of each. All of my former pets come to my mind as I write this. I don't know why I love these creatures as I do, but I do. I don't know if there will be animals in heaven, but I really think it would be neat if all of my old pets were up there waiting for me. I would really love to see them again. Yeah, that would be neat.

Hay Fever

Have you ever known someone that had bad allergies?  I mean, they would have an allergic reaction to the point that it was really a serious matter?  I am that way with hay fever.  It isn't a life or death situation like say, being allergic to peanuts or bee stings.  However, I have hay fever to a point to where I have flu like symptoms.  It is a lot like having the flu.  It only keeps me down for about a week though.  I had it worse when I was young, but now it is coming back like it did then.  I was working out in the yard Saturday and it was really nice out there.  I did not even think about the pollen count here.  Turns out, tree pollen count was very high, and last night, I lost my voice.  My nose resembles a malformed strawberry.  Now I have trouble sharing my words of wisdom with my wife. :) I bet she is devastated! :)

I take a new medicine for my Arthritis, and it is designed to weaken my immune system.  It works!  My immune system is what attacks my joints.  My arthritis is much better as of late, but my hay fever has gotten much worse this year as a result.  Benadryl helps, but doesn't do it all, and I get very sleepy as a result.  Other medicines haven't proved successful at treating the hay fever for me.  Cortisone may help, but I had to take Prednisone for 3 years.  I don't want to go down that path again.  I suppose I'm sharing this because I am seeking more information on the treatment of hay fever.  I thought that you guys might be able to point to some things that I haven't thought of yet.  Contact info is on my profile, or you can comment.  Whatever you prefer.  Gonna go now and talk with my wife about....Oh! That's right. I can't talk.

Gardening and Pests

I just love this time of year! When winter breaks, I get outside with my pruners and garden tools and just have a good old time! I like to see the leaves return to the trees and the feel of the warm sun. I enjoy tilling up the ground and I love the smell of freshly turned soil. Perhaps, I would have made a fair farmer. I always keep my shirt on when I am outside, unlike when I used to live on the farm, because I try to be modest in public. I also want to keep the Shamu jokes down to a minimum. ;)


I have lived where I am now for about 5 years and it has been a real chore trying to garden. The plots where the houses are built were bulldozed to clear trees and the topsoil was taken as a result. Getting red clay to do what you want it to do is not the easiest thing in the world. Every time I see a tree service working on a yard nearby, I roll down my window and ask where they will be taking the mulch. Most companies have to pay to take it to the landfill, so they are glad just to come a few miles and drop it off at my house. I let it sit until the next season while it composts. My neighbors love me! :)


The only thing that I don't like about the area that I garden is the pests. Deer tend to like roses and I have to surround them with plants that deer don't like. Another problem is black widow spiders. I have gardened all of my life and I never recall seeing a place with the number of black widows around here. The other day I took one of the roses that I had rooted from a cutting out of the pot. This black widow came running across my hand but didn't stop to take a bite. I can't get away with not using gloves from here on out. Really bad what black widows can do to you. You can only take the anti-venom once in your life, or so I am told. I was also told that copperheads were really numerous in this area before all of the houses were built. I don't like snakes. So I keep a really sharp lookout for copperheads and cottonmouths. They are the only poisonous snakes that we have around here. They are on my mind when I mow for the most part.

Anyway, I plan to make use of some pretty unorthodox gardening techniques this year to keep me out of the brush as much as possible. I hopefully will have something to share if it is successful. The first flush of roses should start in about a week or so. Most of them are pretty small right now, but I hope to post some pictures when they start. Until then, sleep tight! Don't let the spiders bite!

The Job Hunt

I am going to share something personal today. At present, I have been unemployed just a little over two months now. This job hunting thing really stinks! I live in an area that has an 11.5% unemployment rate, and I am not the youngest or brightest person in the job market. I am, however, resourceful enough to know what strengths I possess. I have long since settled down and am not ever late for work or bad about being absent. Still, it is tough to go out there day after day and look for work and get rejection after rejection. A demoralizing process at best.

I used to work in the weave room of a textile mill. It was what my father did before me, and what my brother did as well. One out of every four people in South Carolina was directly employed or received their support from textiles in the early 1970's. I worked at this type of job from the time I was 16 years old until I was 40 years old. Not many textile mills around now folks. Most of those jobs have long since been exported. I did finally find a job after age 40 as an electroplater for a company in the packaging industry. Electroplating was neat work! I got to work with chemicals, perform analysis, and it sure was interesting to see steel turn to copper right before your eyes! It was great fun right up until the company I worked for closed. Still I am sure there is the "perfect job" out there for me. Not being facetious here, I really mean that! If I keep looking and hold fast to my faith, I really believe things will be all right. I think it is more of an issue of timing than anything else at the moment.

I hope this hasn't turned into a downer kind of post. It just happens to be on my mind at the moment. The work that I have done in the past is wonderful to remember, but it is a memory. Lots of work to yet be done! There is pavement to pound and contacts to be made. Never let it be said of me that I did not try. Whatever life throws at us can be overcome. I believe that with all of my heart. I just happen to wear that heart on my sleeve today. You would never have believed that I read Othello, would you? :)

A Few Questions

You know, some things in life just puzzle me. I am a very easily puzzled person.:) It is like there is some kind of inside joke that the whole world is in on except me. I don't always understand the reasoning behind the things that people do or say. Sometimes I wonder why certain things are. For example:

Why does the car that passes you on the road suddenly see the need to turn off onto another road, forcing you to slow down? Or worse yet, why do they slow down to less than you were going originally? Why do other drivers see the need to tailgate just as you are getting to where you need to make a turn?

Why do companies sell shirts, caps, and shoes to you with their name and logo and force you to advertise for them? Should we not get some sort of discount or royalty or something?

Why does it start to rain just after I have washed my car? Why didn't I check the weather beforehand?

How do sardines swim into the cans in such a neat orderly fashion? If a loaf of bread is green on St. Patrick's Day, is it just feeling festive?

Why don't the cats clean their own litter box? Could it be lack of education? Are they just lazy?

Why will a doctor or dentist chastise you for something concerning your health and charge you money to fuss at you? If doctors and dentists were truly good at their jobs, shouldn't their parking lots be empty?

Why is chocolate not considered a vitamin? Does it not deserve a food group of it's own?

These are the questions of life. Perhaps they are just the questions of one that should get a life.:) Two things are certain, however. I don't have all the answers, and I have way too much time on my hands.

The Redneck Geek Recommends...

From time to time, I like to work with computers. I am talking about actually taking them apart, and tweaking them out like some geek hotrod. We have 4 of them at the house right now. Well, actually we have 7 but I don’t count the ones not in use. I have 2 dead blueberry iMacs with OS9. An older Gateway with Windows XP, and 4 Compaqs. I used to really love the Macs. It just got to be too much of a price tag for me. However, Apple has the most intuative and elegant operating system of all. I don't work on computers for money, I do it because I want to. I’ve always tried to keep from turning my hobby into a job because I think that I will begin to dislike doing it. However, I may have to rethink this soon. You would never know it from looking at this page, but I used to use Dreamweaver and hand code html when I used a Mac. I designed quite a few web pages for people and churches. Just not that much into it these days. My daughter has far surpassed my abilities with web design and css.

I recently bought my wife and and my daughter a computer of their own. My daughter is 17 years old and I was hoping that she would be able to use it when she goes to college. My wife’s computer was bought so that she could have a place to keep her documents and recipes while checking her email from time to time. She gets a ponderous amount of email. Enough that it would drive me crazy. I got them a laptop of their own because I love them. Besides, it keeps them off of my computer. :) I have a laptop that I use with Vista on it and I have this “Linux Box” that I had to reformat this week. Cheap computers are the only ones that I buy. You can do what you want here, but I get inside the guts of all makes and models. Some of the hardware is better in some of the premium models, but not always! At this point in time I only require a dual core processor, good power supply (the most important part!), and a gig or two of ram.

Now for software, I do not use Internet Explorer unless some web page makes me. I use Firefox on all of my computers. It is just safer. Firefox is default on any operating system I use. I use Opera as my feed reader, because l think it has an elegant interface. Email clients tend to be too buggy for me so I just stick with web based email. My preference for operating systems is Linux. Linux is a free (most cases, not all) operating system that is really nice. There are several hundred distributions of Linux. It costs nothing except a little learning curve and works very well and fast. I don’t recommend Linux of any kind if you use dial up. It is a lot of aggravation to get working with a dial up modem. The only reason I use Windows at all is that some of my hardware is not compatible with Linux. Now with a broadband connection, Linux is a great OS! Best part of all is that Linux doesn’t need any security software. Companies do make it, but that is to detect Windows malware that may have been picked up. Windows based spyware and viruses do not affect Linux. It has no native viruses that I am aware of and I have been using it for several years now. You can even run it from a live CD to give it a test drive. I know that Ubuntu will send you a CD free for the asking. I will talk more about security software that I use for Windows later.

With the information that I have given here, and a dollar bill, you may be able to get a cup of coffee. If this information is useful to to you...then I think that's great! If not, well, I'll try harder next time around. This may be all you want to know about computers from a redneck with a thick southern drawl. :) Happy computin' y'all!

Fear

 My wife was the editor of her college newspaper and she was a newspaper reporter shortly after we married. She is an amazing writer when she has the time and opportunity. She is a very gifted and intelligent woman. I only say this because I am trying to lay the groundwork for how articulate, intelligent and wonderful she is. She can face almost any crisis situation with much more control and resolve than I can. The only exception to this is when she knows that she has to go to the dentists office.

A few months ago I noticed that she looked to be in pain when she bit down on something. She did go to a dentist and he said that there was some infection and she could either have the tooth extracted or try and have a root canal.  He said the root canal would be no guarantee of saving the tooth and it may have to come out anyway. At any rate, she had to take care of the infection first. Well, she took the antibiotic and never went back to the dentist. I would ask her about it and she didn't really want to talk about it. "I'll take care of it when I'm ready." That was the best answer I got. Some of her siblings also have this pathological fear of dentists. I am not really sure as to why.  Last week I told her to call the dentist and set up an appointment. "I really didn't like that dentist. He had an attitude." That is what I got this time. Folks, I consider myself a patient person, but this was getting ridiculous.  Finally we set up an appointment with another dentist and everything is set. Now I went with her to this appointment for fear that she would put it off like the last time. Or worse, skip out on the appointment all together. Long story short, everything went well and the offending tooth is now gone. :) Truly, I am proud of my wife for facing this fear.

This experience has made me wonder why we are so captive to a phobia of any kind.  In most cases that thing or act that we are so afraid of never comes to pass.  If it does, it can usually be dealt with head on and resolved.  I used to be afraid to ask girls out directly for fear of rejection.  I wish I had that one to do over. :) These fears keep us from living our life to the fullest.  Am I alone in this or do we all have these things that scare and intimidate us?  I suppose the biggest fear that I have is to not try because I was afraid. That would surely be the biggest tragedy of all.

Khris' Poetry

I have read a lot of blogs in the past month. I mean a lot! This is a whole new world to me that I never knew existed before now. What is a feed reader now? ;) For the most part, I am impressed with how well they are written. The others? That's a whole different post. I am genuinely impressed with how heartfelt you all are. Some things have been shared that have really stirred my heart, my thoughts, my very being. Since most of the readers of this will be other bloggers, I wanted to let you all know that I respect what I have read so far, and if I have commented on another person's blog, it was from my heart. Now that's the end of the serious stuff. If everyone is ready, let's have a little fun.

I have come across blogs on life, cooking, travel, philosophy, etc., etc. The blogs that I have the most difficult time understanding are the blogs on poetry. I guess I always thought that I could write poetry. In the fifth grade we were required to create a limerick. The one that I made up went like this:

There once was a guy named Slim
That wasn't very trim.
He wanted to try it,
so he went on a diet.
And that was the end of him.

Pretty cute for a fifth grader huh? The fame of that one carried me all the way through middle school. :) By the time I got to the tenth grade, I decided to come out of retirement. A friend of mine and I came up with a poem that was supposed to be the base of a song. It went like this:

When I die, bury me deep.
Put a jar of honey at my feet.
Put a big hot biscuit in my hand,
And I'll sop my way to Glory Land.

That one, took me all the way to graduation. :) I later found out that this was a rewrite of a traditional minstrel tune. This friend and I rewrote the theme from the "Beverly Hillbillies", but since this is a clean blog, and I am a Christian now, I must refrain from sharing it. After this, I retired for good except for the occasional songwriting attempts. I won't torture you with those. Needless to say, I really don't have the skill it takes to write poetry. My thought processes just don't run that deep. I truly do admire those that can do it, and I don't mean to offend those that write it. I'm just havin' a little fun. :)

I just wish that I had paid a little more attention in English class. However, I would always end up in the class with the pretty girls. If I had it to do over again, I would....definitely pay more attention to the pretty girls! :)

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter everyone! Springtime is a perfect time for Easter. It signifies the true end of Winter and the true beginning of Spring. It is a time of new life and renewal, Easter bunnies and egg hunts. The joy and laughter of children as they frolic in their finest Easter clothes. The priceless look on their faces as they see their Easter baskets. Truly, it is a special time of year. Personally, for me, it is a day of rememberance for a risen Savior. The One who gave his life so that the world could live. The fact that He took his life back up is what makes this a joyful occasion for me rather than a somber one. So today, be happy! Celebrate life! Be joyful with the ones you come in contact with today. Easter is a time of new beginnings, for new life, and a second chance to start all over again.

The Return of Arthur

Today has been an overcast day here in NC with a band of thunderstorms moving through. I used to really love a good thunderstorm in the warm weather months. There was just something invigorating about it. Now, however, I dread these systems because it brings with it and old enemy named Arthur. Arthur Itis. Arthur and I have never really got along all that well. I would just as soon that he leave forever. He usually just brings a lot of pain in my shoulders, hands, hips and knees. He is just one of those ungrateful house guests that you can't wait to see go. He always arrives unannounced and stays for an indeterminate time. I think it will be a relatively short visit this time, but one never knows. I had not planned to post again to this blog until after Easter, but he has infuriated me so that I just had to get it off my chest! So Mr. Arthur Itis! Will you please leave this place? Be sure not to let the door hit you on the way out!

Gratitude

This is a story that I heard in a church I attended many years ago. This has been on my mind a lot lately so I wrote it down to clear my head more than anything else. I don't recall who told it to me or I would credit them here, but it is a story worth sharing.

Once there was this fellow that worked at a factory. He didn't make a lot of money at his job, although, it was an adequate living. As he left the building to the parking lot, he noticed there was a dollar bill laying in the drivers seat of his car. Puzzled, he looked around to see if there was someone there, and he picked up the bill put it in his pocket and went home. The next day, the same exact thing happened. “Someone is doing this just for me!”, he thought. This continued for a couple of weeks. At the beginning of the third week, there was a five dollar bill on the seat. Smiling, he picked it up and put it in his pocket and drove away home. This continued for about a week. The next week, it was a ten dollar bill everyday for a week. He was very excited about this! He was already rushing out to his car everyday just so no one would see that bill on his seat and steal it from him. Right on schedule, the next week there was a twenty dollar bill on the seat. This continued for four days. On Friday that week, he hurried out to his car and there was a one dollar bill on his seat. He was puzzled again. Confusion turned to disappointment, and then to anger. He put the dollar bill in his pocket, slammed the car door and drove away angry.

This story was told to me a long time ago to teach me about being grateful. I wasn't the man in the story, but It could have been me. Sometimes it is me! How grateful am I for the things I receive without asking for them? When life's twenty dollar bill turns into life's dollar bill, can I be thankful? If you noticed, he did nothing for the money, except to pick it up. He wasn't grateful at any time for the money, he was just glad to have it. The family and friends that we have are gifts. Any wealth, prosperity, or health are gifts as well. We should endeavor to do the best that we can with what we have. We get all sorts of blessings we don't deserve or ask for and then get angry when the blessings are taken away. Tell me, what are you thankful for today?

A rose by any other name

Gonna do something a little different today. I have a secret passion. Gardening! :) I like to grow things, water them, watch them grow, and make little plants from big plants. I have mixed emotions as well as talents with this hobby. I have 2 thumbs, one green and the other brown. I'm pretty good at getting seedlings to grow, or taking cuttings and making them thrive. However, unless something is pretty hardy, I will usually see it die away. I am not not real good at taking care of plants that need pampering. I grow roses and other things, but this post is about my roses. At one time I had about 18 or so growing in my yard, but that has now turned into about 7 or 8. Most of them are not looking too well at this point. I decided about 2 years ago that I would only deal with shrub or rugosa roses from here on out. I like the blossoms on hybrid teas, but cannot give them the attention they need. Here are 4 of my roses I have pictures of.


This is a small shrub rose called Tweety. This was always a pretty rose, but small and prone to all kinds of problems for me. Just stayed sick the whole time I had it. Blackspot was horrible and it died after 2 years.










This is a hybrid tea called Ruffles. Prone to blackspot for me and cane borers were a problem. The bloom here was over 5 inches across. This one died down and came back true from rootstock. Currently in critical condition.













This is called 21st Century. Another hybrid tea rose. Pretty golden rose, but it's century ended after one season. Blackspot was a nightmare.















Now, I show you the pride of what was my rose collection. A shrub rose called Knockout. I got this before it was released to the public because my wife knew someone that worked in a commercial nursery getting them ready for debut around here. Bloomed continuously through the growing season. It took 2 frosts to kill all of the blossoms in the fall. It would be fine today if an over zealous gardener had not used too much fertilizer. That would be me folks. I burned it up and did a good job of it. I did, however, manage to clip off all the canes from it and it turned into 18 little roses. I have it's little brother growing in the same spot this day, but much smaller right now.

I have several more roses in my garden. Some do well without any work at all, like the Knockout. Some won't die even if I wanted them to, like an old antique rose down at the bottom of the garden. Just a figure of speech folks, I don't want any of them dead.

I am happy to share this with everyone. Just don't tell my buddies about this. They believe men should be macho, and I don't think growing roses will be as big with them as the fish I caught. Gardening is a great stress reliever though and I wish I could stay out there more than I do. I plan to really get to work on it this year and maybe... just maybe, I will get something to last till next year this time. :)

Goodbye to a friend

Earlier this week, while I was getting ready to take a bath, I noticed a lot of hair in the bottom of the bathtub. Now I know that it is normal to see a little now and then, but this was enough to fill the hollow of my hand! First thing I thought was, "Why is my wife losing so much hair?" I was alarmed. We have been plagued with many health problems the past few years. She has Multiple Sclerosis and I have Rheumatoid Arthritis. She also had a benign tumor removed a couple of years ago near her brain stem. So when I saw this, I guess I just thought the worst. After talking with her combined with the technical "looking in the mirror," I have discovered that it is my hair that I held in my hand. I am relieved that it is no dire heath issue. While I am very happy for her, I am really bummed out about the hair loss. I am a child of the 70's and my hair was a big part of my life. No pun intended. I would wash it, comb it, even talk to it if it messed up on me. Folks, there is a lot less to talk to or about these days. I keep it a lot shorter these days, but still try to be well groomed.

I suppose this too is part of the aging process, and somehow I will come to terms with it. Just kinda hurts to know that soon more hair will grow from my ears and nose than the top of my head. Everyone, I suppose, has a feature that they consider their best. My hair was mine. I also have resolved that I won't wear a hairpiece, no matter how tempted I am to do so. Don't want to get to be an old man and have more of me on the dresser than in the bed when I go to sleep at night.

At the current rate, I would say about 5 years, maybe sooner. Perhaps balding will provide that distinguished look for me. I hope so, and time will tell. To my hair I have some final words: au revoir old friend, au revoir.

A Love Story

When I was 23 years old, I had not dated for a couple of years. I was just tired of the routine, and to be honest, not finding anyone that suited me. When I would find someone that I liked, they had issues with me for one reason or another. Sometimes the parents didn't approve of me. Sometimes they would meet someone they liked better. This kind of thing gets very old! Very fast! So I just stopped dating altogether. Still lonely, dejected and just not happy about a lot of things in general, I picked up the newspaper. In the classified section there was this small advertisement about a computer dating service called "Dateline". Now I had seen these ads before and told myself that I didn't need that sort of thing. Matter of fact, I had seen those ads for quite some time now. Just a small 3 line ad. No bells or whistles or anything. For some reason, I had this strong desire to find out more about this place and I mailed them for an application. About a week later I got the application and filled it out and sent in the $25 fee. They claimed to match you up with someone according to your likes and dislikes, faith, and all kinds of criteria. I was honest when I answered, but didn't really think they could find someone for me within the 100 mile radius that I had chosen. Turned out I was right. They found 3! :) I lived near Honea Path, SC and there was one woman in Gaffney, one in Columbia and another in Lexington just outside of Columbia. Pretty good for 25 bucks! I was planning to make my calls the next day and get the normal rejection kind of thing that I had grown so fond of. Turns out, one of them called me first. It was the one from Lexington, SC. I was surprised how pleasant she sounded. She was intelligent and very well spoken. I was impressed and we soon set up our first date.

One Saturday in October, I went down to see her. I got lost about 5 miles from her house and had to find a pay phone. She gave me directions and soon I was there. We talked for a while and I took her to lunch. By this time I was thinking, "What a bargain for 25 bucks!" We spent the day walking and talking and laughing. I really liked this woman. We spent all day together and after supper I took her home. I had a long drive ahead of me so I kissed her goodnight. She actually kissed me back! Most women didn't usually kiss on a first date. Most guys will always try though. It was worth trying! This was the opposite of rejection! How did that happen? I don't really remember too much about the drive home except for this floating feeling I had all the way home. I was infatuated with her at that point, not in love. That came a few months later. When it happened, it just kind of sneaked up on me. Strange thing is that I never heard from the other 2 ladies that Dateline had set me up with, nor could I ever get in contact with them. That never bothered me. Really, I believe that our meeting was preordained. Anyway, I got the one that mattered. Now I believe, with all of my heart, that there is someone for everyone. It is a far better thing to have what you need rather than what you want. I am very blessed that I got both! I do not believe in luck at all. I believe in providence!

This computer date has since become my wife, the mother of our daughter, and all that I could ever want or desire. I think that I truly got the best of the deal. I got her and she only got me, and I can be a difficult person to be with at times. Even though our meeting was unconventional, it was meant to be. I love her with all that I am. I told that to a dear friend of mine this past week. It is more true today than it was yesterday, but not as much as it will be tomorrow. And it only cost me 25 dollars! :)